Today has been kind of sucky (yep, that’s a word in my world). In fact, this week has been more of a struggle. Depression and it’s evil twin anxiety have had the upper hand a lot more than usual. What an odd mix it is to feel like I don’t give a shit and be super stressed about it at the same time. Really makes little sense…but that’s what the evil twins do, isn’t it? I know I can’t simply dismiss them from my life but this moment of reflection is helping me kick their asses down a notch for now.
On a slightly forced positive note, I’m pretty happy with how I’ve been doing with this focus on better physical health too. I haven’t stuck to the plan 100% but I’ve made so many better choices and had the will power to avoid giving in to food cravings. The phrase, “I’m human” doesn’t sound like a complete cliche all the time, it’s true. I am human. I make mistakes. And I don’t need to beat myself up over every one of them. I’ve stuck to the meal plan most of the time and am actually enjoying it. I’m trying to celebrate those smaller wins, rather than focus on the longer term goals so much. That step-by-step, day-by-day, even minute-by-minute, successes are what will get me to those long term goals so let’s celebrate them, right?
Another thing worth celebrating? I’m on vacation next week and am really looking forward to time away. Planning some good reads and relaxation time. And I’m planning my meals for the week to stick to my plan…at least most of the time, like humans do.
Phew, bit of a ramble but a healthy cleansing one. I’m wrapping up my day feeling much better than I was a short while ago. Evil twins be damned, I’m ending today with the upper hand.